the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Randomize
