I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I checked into jail on foursquare
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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