I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
