she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize