Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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