the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
