508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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