is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
