scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
try to milk me bitch
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