'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Are we still banned from the library?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Randomize
