I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
