69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
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