Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
