he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
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