Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Randomize
