Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
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