I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
