pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
