Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
drinking out of a sandbucket again
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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