i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
