i'm lost and i look like a hooker
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
