She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
