would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
