it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
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