seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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