seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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