My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
