first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
