Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Randomize
