So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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