I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
These tits shall not be calmed
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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