I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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