Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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