its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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