the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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