AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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