so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
