hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
