Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
