so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
