apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
