I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize