I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize