Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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