He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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