So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Randomize
