Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
and you fell through a lawn chair
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
