He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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