I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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