We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Randomize
