..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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