I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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